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Lmao, I never post, and yet here I am...

So I really like this one dude, but I'm afraid he doesn't like me. (That's just always my story. No guy has ever liked me in that way.) So this time, I started liking him despite the fact that he had a girlfriend. I felt really guilty every time I was with him; I just wanted to get closer to him, to get to know him better, and I told myself that I wasn't trying to get in his good graces to steal him away. But inwardly, I really think I was trying to separate him from his g/f, even though she seemed sweet and everything. I had no reason to dislike her, other than the fact that she was dating the guy I liked.

So I guess to "repent" for my guilt, every time I thought he was sending a weird signal to me, I just brushed it off. By weird signals, I mean things like when he said I was hot (do guys with g/f's say that to other girls?); or when he brought me some of his dinner for me to eat and I was like noooo, but he was like, 'I wouldn't bring it for you if I didn't want you to eat it'; or when he invited me to his place to drink some soup at like midnight (albeit, he did later invite his g/f over, which threw me off). So every time he did something like this, I would just say 'thanks' really obnoxiously to act like it didn't mean much to me, when in fact, I was just soaking it up and loving it.

Argh, I am such a girl. And it's just so weird, because if you knew me for real, you'd say I was one of the un-girliest girls you'll ever know. It goes to show that no matter how aggressive or in control I want to be on the outside, I'm still just an emotional woman on the inside.



Feb. 4th, 2010 03:02 pm (UTC)
It's... kind of cute.
Feb. 4th, 2010 10:15 pm (UTC)
Ahahaha. Boys suck. XD

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